Have you noticed how your life looks like a story on repeat?
We’ve seen this in our lives, so we felt too compelled to find a way out of these vicious cycles.

Marina (M): I’ve noticed how in the past two years something similar has been happening to me: I go out on dates, start something like a relationship and in December everything is over. I just suffer for longer or shorter periods of time. I’ve noticed this because I have a notebook with 366 pages where I write daily. I was shocked when I saw that things repeat almost by day. Even going on a date with a different man with the same name on the same date a year later. It was quite surprising because the names weren’t very common.
Sooo, now I’m trying to make a change. That’s why I decided to do 33 days of Love, Dedication and Ahimsa — a combination of fasting, some behaviour rules and meditation. Now, I try to give myself more time to get to know the person. I have the feeling that most of the people have closed their hearts, so I want to give them time to open up. Also, I spend time on my heart-opening process with some yin yoga and focus on slowing down. I have this tendency to do lots of things, to be impatient and to expect that people are ok with my fast speed of connection.

Andrei (A): Was that your decision to end the relationship in the past two years?

M: Nope, not at all, both men just disappeared without saying anything. They simply stopped answering my messages, didn’t answer my phone calls and didn’t return my phone calls.

A: Ouch, that sounds like a really painful experience.

M: Yes, it was. That’s why I told you I suffered in December two years in a row. That’s the reason I want to break this cycle.

A: I resonate with the idea of reflection on the repeating patterns. What I’ve seen on my side is that these changes are not really easy. First, I have to be honest with myself and sometimes to recognize I am not perfect, and I’ve made some mistakes. This is really tough. Even when my closest friends are telling me something, it takes a while to understand. It happens that I say “this is not true” and I don’t let them share their opinion honestly.

We invite you to explore your life and to search for recurring events. It is an interesting process. You can also ask friends to help you with that. They usually have a more objective perspective of your life. We recommend going to a playback theater performance. There you will see your story from a different angle.